Don't Fall Asleep Man!
Author: Bert Booth
Laughlin AFB 85-02, October 5, 1984 (about 2/3 of the way through T-38s)
Classmate's name for me as I'd walk out of tests while he's slaving away. "You going to the bathroom?" "I'm done." "F*** Booth."
Doing the NAV weekend homework. Big questionnaire on looking at maps, MEAs on X airways, which frequency to contact FSS, what ATC frequencies are active in that sector, etc, etc. Two friends in my Q working on theirs one Sunday. I'm in my recliner watching the NFL game and helping out when necessary. Both eventually FARed—one CFI (F-16), one ROTC guy (T-38 FAIP).
J.D'O (F*** Booth originator) keeps calling. "Hey, on question #15 where did they get that answer?" After several calls I say "John, it's easier if you come over." "Nah, I don't want to bother you." "Stick and Chiffer are here, I'm watching the game. There's room for you."
He comes over, sees me kicked back in my recliner. "F*** Booth, you ARE watching the game!" He was FARed and flew RF-4s.
Fast forward and John's the spotter in Lariat with the binoculars, Capt. Larry Elam (one of our IPs) is the controller, and I'm out bombing around on a solo contact ride.
It was only a 1.0 (logbook review) so I might have switched to using the Holloman power (MAX versus MIL) and Gs (6 versus 5 Gs) and airspeeds (450 versus 500 for over the top stuff). Loops went from about 10,000 feet to 6,000 feet. Burner use eats into the gas consumed = shorter flight.
So I come back to the pattern a bit light on gas. Grab an overhead or two. Solo's supposed to be down with 1,000 lbs, 800 lbs dual, 600 lbs is min fuel, and 400 lbs is emergency fuel. I'm alone in the pattern. Should have made a full stop (1,000 lbs) but it's just me in the T-38 pattern. "Closed approved."
Plan for one more touch and go then full stop. Dual flight calls in VFR entry. Arghhh, if I hustle I can sneak in one more closed. Flying the final turn as fast as I can, land hot, immediately power up and going for speed.
"XYZ initial." Arggh... I'm not anywhere near the end of the runway. You have to be at the end of the runway to request a closed, but if the pattern wasn't busy the RSU controller would work with the IPs if they make a snap call after the new aircraft calls "initial."
Try for a quick IP courtesy from Lariat: "Request closed."
Capt Elam isn't buying it... "Neeegggatttive."
Okay, off to the outside pattern I'll go. Land around 800 lbs. Ssshhh.
Check VFR entry on downwind... engine gauges check... oops, no oil pressure in one engine. EE-7 (whatever it was, we knew it by heart by then)—zero PSI = engine shutdown. Alright, let the games begin. I KNOW they're going to be ringing bells with a solo, single engine, and the other T-38 just landed.
"Lariat—XYZ, outside downwind, declaring emergency, single engine, descending for the straight in."
As the Brits say "proper RT" and I get the perfect reply from Capt. Larry Elam: "Say again?!?!"
Repeat the RT.
"Roger, emergency, for the s/e straight in."
I get the after action report from my classmate (spotter), Capt. Elam, and Assistant Flight CC later.
On final: "XYZ, switch to the center runway, cleared to land on the center."
"Roger. Want me to switch to tower freq?"
They don't like that... too many students go NORDO.
"Negative. You are cleared to land this freq."
I know they're pinging.
Final gear call—spoken clearly, slowly, and deliberately because I know they're sweating this: "XYZ, straight in, gear down, single engine, emergency aircraft."
John D' told me afterwards: "You sounded like you're falling asleep! Phone calls back and forth, everyone's watching you, and you're falling asleep!"
"F***ing Booth, don't fall asleep!" 🙂
Inside Lariat calls SOF, SOF hits the 'PA to ALL' button: "H Flight IP to SOF desk. ASAP!"
Just then Jeff Ault, assistant flight CC, comes bouncing into the SOF desk. "I'm H flight. What's up?"
SOF: "How's Booth doing?"
"He's a brick, why?"
Capt. Ault said he realized it wasn't time to kid around when he saw the SOF going pale: "He's single engine, low on gas, and no one airborne to help him."
"He's doing fine!" LOL.
So I've got less than 5 minutes of single engine time in my career (not counting SEL time).
Oh, I forgot. I was fudging my fuel calls a bit. I might be dumb but I'm not that dumb.
