You Grabbed the Wrong Pony, Al!
Story Credit: Bobo
Story Type: Instructor Pilot
"You Grabbed the Wrong Pony, Al"
I reported to Vance AFB, Oklahoma in early January 1975. My initial T-38 "checkout" at the time consisted of Pre-PIT at Vance, followed by the formal PIT course at Randolph Field, Texas, where I had attended UPT.
Pre-PIT was a program designed to help us "re-qualify" in the jet before heading off to IP School. You had to be "P-Qualed" (Pilot Qualified) in the jet before you could be an instructor—made sense. The program consisted of an abbreviated academic course and two flying phases: Contact and Instrument, with simulator sessions ("Links") throughout. We also got a couple of 2-ship Formation rides at the end to refamiliarize ourselves with formation flying.
I loved getting back into the '38! Even though I'd been out of the jet for almost three years, it felt so familiar—I felt so much at home in that cockpit. I knew from that first day that I was going to love being an IP.
One of the first things I had to do during Pre-PIT was take the Air Force Annual Instrument Exam. This was an open-book exam that followed a two-hour refresher course and took about 3-4 hours on average to complete. By design, the test was meant to get us "back in the books."
The exam was 100 questions. In those days, we filled out a "bubble sheet" with No. 2 pencils. Then the test administrators would take a "grade sheet" with the correct answers punched out, overlay it on your answer sheet, and mark the incorrect answers. Simple enough.
I took the course and exam on a cold winter day in 1975 in the base theater. I was about 10-15 minutes into it when I noticed Captain Al S. walking down to the front with his answer sheet in hand. A cigarette hung loosely from his mouth, as it always did. Al handed his grade sheet to the examiner and waited for the result.
The examiner reached into his briefcase and pulled out an answer sheet marked "Annual Instrument Exam." He laid it over Al's answer sheet, then got a really concerned look on his face. Hardly anything lined up! He shifted the answer sheet a bit, looked again, then reached back into his briefcase and pulled out another answer sheet—only this one was marked "Annual Proficiency Exam." He laid it on Al's answer sheet.
All the answers lined up perfectly!
"Hey Al," he said, looking up from the table, "it looks like you grabbed the wrong pony!" (Crib sheet)
Al's face dropped—and so did the cigarette!
They let it go for a bit to make their point, then sent Al back with a fresh answer sheet to try again. Knowing the consequences otherwise, Al was more than willing to take the test as designed.
Of note: while all this was going on, 1Lt. Pat R. also went down to have his test graded. When he saw what happened to Al, he turned and headed back to his seat.
"Not so fast, Patrick," said the examiner.
"Oh, I just had a question," Pat replied as he returned to his seat to review his answers.
I'm sitting there watching all this and just cracking up!
